Like so many right now, I have been working through recurring shadows. These curtains that I thought I had pulled back far enough to let in the light are darkening again with shadows showing up for another round.

The two shadows I am referring to go hand-in-hand for me.

1. Abandonment

2. Death, specifically as it relates to animals.

The abandonment is tied to my human relationships. I have spent many years working through this trauma. Dissecting the wild, crazy emotions that would come up every time I was triggered. Silly me, I thought I had worked through all of that and the, BAM, it rears its ugly head again just a few weeks ago.

The death of animals still is one that shakes me to my core, especially roadkill as it feels so traumatic and disrespectful to that beautiful being and to this planet that I love so dearly. I would physically shutter when I would pass a dead animal on the road.

How I found out these both tie together is quite interesting.

A year ago I listened to the audio book; A Hypnotist’s Journey to Atlantis. When I got to the chapter that discussed the animal-human hybrids I completely lost it. My whole body went into a state of goosebumps as I listen to this recount with tears streaming down my face. I couldn’t understand this visceral reaction. I spend the next few months trying to dissect why I had these overwhelming emotions.

A dear friend who just became a QHHT practitioner regressed me to see if we could uncover any events that would possibly created my intense reaction to the hybrids from the book.

During my regression I immediately went back to my life in Atlantis. I was indeed an animal-human hybrid, I saw that had hooves. It was a traumatic experience where I was abused, abandoned and left to suffer and die.

Abandonment, animal suffering and death. It was now starting to gel.

As time went on I continued to be triggered by animals suffering and animals dying. Inherently I know the soul is removed before the physical trauma of death,(unless the soul wanted to experience that trauma). I knew I still was carrying something I hadn’t released. It was feeling closer, yet I wasn’t quite able to pull it forward for examination.

Fast forward to a couple weeks ago. I went to see the new Guardians of the Galaxy 3 movie. I had no clue the premise of this new movie in the series before hand. Interestingly, it proved to be another piece of my shadow puzzle. The plot centered around the Raccoon character, Rocket. Rocket is an animal-human hybrid. Yep, can you see where this gets interesting? Rocket ends up getting severely injured and during his coma, he recounts the time when he was turned into a hybrid. His memories show him the other animals around him who were also disfigured hybrids and how they were caged and abused. I spent the majority of the movie holding back the deep emotions bubbling inside of me. I left that movie still befuddled on where I needed to go next on this unfolding shadow journey.

I went back into deep meditative contemplation, feeling into my physical and etheric body, searching and asking to be shown.

Then a couple of days ago, on my walk by the farms behind my neighborhood out on the country road, I came up upon a dead cat. Normally my heart would immediately sink and I’d break out in tears. But as I got closer to the body, I wasn’t feeling those feelings. I stood over this cat, emotionless. I looked at the animal with the straightforwardness of a medical examiner. As I closely observed his body, the dried blood trickling out of his ear and mouth, I starred. I simply observed. I was looking at an empty container. I literally saw a furry purse shaped like a cat that now held absolutely nothing inside of it. I felt nothing. The soul that gives off it’s life-force and all the feelings that go with it was no longer there.

My only thought now was for respect of his vessel, so I grabbed two sticks and gently moved the cat’s now frozen stiff body to the side of the road so he could be preserved should the owner come to claim him.

As I walked home I as stunned by my reaction. As with all my reactions that I find unusual, I knew this is an opportunity for more digging.

In quiet contemplation I was able to uncover so much more than I am able to articulate here. This proved to be a multi-level soul experience that defies human words or description, it is more of a deep inner knowing that unravels a profound level of soul healing.

For the sake of sharing, as best I can in our limited human vocabulary, in essence, seeing that cat’s dead body was a perfect visual for my human to witness the human-to-soul connection in the physical, a reminder that the body is merely the vessel. The soul carries the emotion, the personality, the feelings, the wonderment of life, of any life, human or animal-hybrid. Of course I “know” all this and have most of my life. However the unraveling of this shadow and how the visuals played out for my human to integrate this hand in hand with my soul’s emotional trauma unfolding; it all merged together so syncronistically in one fell swoop! Perhaps you can feel the energy behind this as that is what is most powerful.

My soul couldn’t of planned it better.